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c.: you were their king and you made everything right?
m.: yeah!
c.: well, you know, what about loneliness?
d.: what he’s saying is, will you keep out all the sadness?
m.: i have a sadness shield. keeps out all the sadness. it’s big enough for all of us!

– where the wild things are

my first post that gained 100 notes. thank you!

In my restless dreams,
I see that town.

Silent Hill.

You promised me you’d take me
there again someday.
But you never did.

Well, I’m alone there now…
In our ‘special place’…
Waiting for you…

Waiting for you to
come to see me.

But you never do.

And so I wait, wrapped in my
cocoon of pain and loneliness.

I know I’ve done a terrible
thing to you. Something you’ll
never forgive me for.

I wish I could change
that, but I can’t.

I feel so pathetic and ugly
laying here, waiting for you…

Every day I stare up at the cracks
in the ceiling and all I can think
about is how unfair it all is…

The doctor came today.
He told me I could go
home for a short stay.

It’s not that I’m getting better.
It’s just that this may be
my last chance…

I think you know what I mean…

Even so, I’m glad to be coming
home. I’ve missed you terribly.

But I’m afraid, James.
I’m afraid you don’t really
want me to come home.

Whenever you come see me,
I can tell how hard it is on you…

I don’t know if you
hate me or pity me…
Or maybe I just disgust you…

I’m sorry about that.

When I first learned that
I was going to die, I just
didn’t want to accept it.

I was so angry all the time and I
struck out at everyone I loved most.
Especially you, James.

That’s why I understand
if you do hate me.

But I want you to
know this, James.

I’ll always love you.

Even though our life together had
to end like this, I still wouldn’t
trade it for the world. We had
some wonderful years together.

Well, this letter has gone on
too long, so I’ll say goodbye.

I told the nurse to give
this to you after I’m gone.

That means that as you read
this, I’m already dead.

I can’t tell you to remember me,
but I can’t bear for you to
forget me.

These last few years since I
became ill… I’m so sorry for
what I did to you, did to us…

You’ve given me so much and
I haven’t been able to return
a single thing.

That’s why I want you to live
for yourself now.
Do what’s best for you, James.


You made me happy…

Mary’s Letter

my friends are about to drop their 2nd album. i love this A-Side/B-Side variant. dabble in!

at first, today, i woke up. all over instagram images of robin williams appeared. soon i grasped that he died. i got to work. soon after i got home i watched ‘good will hunting’. it already bummed me out. next, i remembered serena, a kind guest i hosted this week, pointing at the Jeniferever records in my shelf and telling me she loves em as well. so i put on their first record. mood swings more and more. this day is a hole never to be escaped from.

this marks thuesday, the 12th august 2014, 21:36 pm.

these days, when one puts trust in words of people that one expected to be credible and ends up feeling defrauded because it seems, people dont inescapably place value on the relation are wasted days. fuck that priggish shitfaces that aren’t available for empathy excect for themselves.

Help me up, throw me down,
love me hot, suck me out,
to hear these words, to see it works,
to feel its good, to hear these words.

let it all go, let it flow,
bury your fucking mind.

I Not Dance

listen. to. this. band.

with AS WE DRAW playing the AC17 a long-cherished dream finally comes true on 21st october 2014.

SVFFERs first track off their debut LP ‘Lies We Live’

Pure hate we get
What we deserve
Amuse to death
Swallow the dirt

– Svffer

today at breakfast time i had the privilege to listen to two demo recordings of new material from The Black Atlantic’s upcoming album.
if his former recordings and concerts had the ability to make one shiver these will do so too, but in a quite different way.

this marks sunday, the 02nd march 2014, 10:16 am.


VOTE HERE. HOW MANY YOU WANT. The best 4 of each “group” go to fight against each other to remind ourselves that life is a costant struggle and there’s someone who wins and someone who loses.


Lord Snow
Silkscreened Tour Edition

suppressed by their possessive demeanor,
dictating lives with successive requisition.
youthful ambitions that we’ve abandoned
for obligations they have demanded.

we have spent years circling the system
we have spent years circling drain.
grounded on faith for an escape.

Lord Snow